Types of Schools

Have you ever begun a project only to realize after a while that you didn't know what you were doing? It's like the guy who opens the box with 100 parts. Some assembly is required. Does he read the directions? Probably only when he gets stuck.

When you set out to choose a private school for your child, you need a clear road map for the process. You also need to understand that this is a major project that will consume a substantial amount of your valuable time.

How much time will it take?

* Researching schools online: 20-30 hours spread out over 4-6 weeks. This task can be done in the comfort of your own home on your own time.

* Visiting out-of-town schools: 36-60 hours spread out over 3 or 4 visits. The amount of time consumed by travel is the wild card here. The actual campus visit will usually include an interview with the admissions staff. Allow about an hour for testing.

* Visiting local schools: 10-15 hours spread out over 2 or 3 visits. Interviews and any testing the schools require will add an hour or two.

Signs that you may be doing it wrong

As you can see, choosing a private school is a major project. Get it wrong, and your child will be very unhappy and hate her school. It's also possible that your child won't even get into a school. So, before you get that sinking feeling that you are doing

The pendulum has swung once more. This time in favor of the advantages of single-sex education. New research quantifies what many of us have known anecdotally, namely that single-sex education works. Here are a dozen boys' schools' public thoughts about themselves and their missions.

From Avon Old Farms , Avon, Connecticut

As a boys' boarding school, our programs are designed to help young men focus on their development at a time when distractions abound. Although numerous opportunities exist for our students to interact with girls from Miss Porter's, Ethel Walker's, and other nearby schools, boys are free to live and learn in our structured, supportive environment. In an all-boys context, our students embrace scholastic challenges and compete in the athletic arena while feeling safe exploring the arts, experimenting with poetry, expressing school spirit, and just being themselves.

Avon Old Farms offers grades 9-12 and a Postgraduate year. The school serves approximately 500 young men.

From Marquette University High School, Milwaukee, Wisconsin

MUHS has evolved with each passing decade to meet the changing needs of the young men in our community and like our 17th Century namesake, Father Jacques Marquette, students, faculty and staff members share a passion for exploring uncharted territory, whether it’s in a textbook or their own hearts.

Marquette University High School offers grades 9-12. The school

I thought it might be instructive to gather a dozen or so girls' schools' public thoughts about themselves and their missions. The words which I have quoted can be found on each school's web site. Hopefully, if you are thinking about sending your daughter to an all girls' school, you will be inspired to explore the opportunities available to you in these fine educational environments committed to educating your daughters to be all they can be.

From Nightingale-Bamford School, New York, New York

"Founded by two bold, visionary entrepreneurs in the same year that women won the right to vote, the Nightingale-Bamford School has helped generations of girls to become strong, independent, confident women. We offer a rigorous, college-preparatory education from Kindergarten through grade 12 in a caring and attentive school community."

"Over the 90 years since our school was founded, we have graduated almost 3,000 alumnae, expanded our building four times, and adopted new disciplines and means of teaching. But throughout it all, we've retained the same guiding principles that Miss Nightingale and Miss Bamford instilled in those first students: truth, friendship, and loyalty."

The Nightingale-Bamford School offers grades K-12. The school serves approximately 570 young ladies.

From Saint Mary's School, Raleigh, North Carolina

"Saint Mary’s School has developed curriculum and employed strategies that capitalize on the strengths of girls on

Despite your best efforts, in-depth interviews, and hours of due diligence, you begin to realize that the school that you thought was so perfect for your preschooler is, in fact, the wrong one. So, what do you do when things don't work out?

I have just been through this stressful situation with one of my grandchildren. (I won't mention which school or name names out of professional courtesy.) It was a gut-wrenching experience for my daughter and son-in-law, just as it would be for any set of concerned parents.

The warning signs

The warning signs of a bad fit are simple to detect: your child is unhappy. She comes home from school in tears, frustrated, or both. She doesn't look forward to going to school in the morning. The last thing any parent wants is a four-year-old who doesn't want to attend school. You won't necessarily notice that something is wrong. There probably won't be a big blow-up at school. What's more likely to happen is a series of little events over a period of several weeks, perhaps even months. An isolated incident of unhappiness is nothing to be worried about. A trend of daily episodes in which your child expresses frustration and unhappiness is definitely something you want to keep your eyes on.

This video illustrates some of the things that indicate your child is unhappy with his school.

What do you do?

Once

One of the best things about private schools is that there is a school out there somewhere which is just right for your educational objectives, whatever those might be. As you begin to draw a picture of the kind of school which you would like your child to attend, you just might discover that the structured environment and leadership training military schools are well known for is just what you are looking for.

So, what about military schools? When might you consider sending your son or daughter to a military school? Let’s settle a couple of things before we proceed: military schools are not places you send a child with discipline or other issues. They are not reform schools or schools for troubled youth. If a professional such as a psychologist or psychiatrist recommends your child attend a therapeutic school, you will have plenty of options for that purpose. Military schools are genuine institutions of learning with a specific focus: military training. Second, military service is not required when you attend a military high school. If your child decides that military service is a career path which she wants to pursue, then a military school will have given her a good start.

Discipline

In life just about anything worth doing well requires lots of discipline. Discipline takes hard work, persistence, stamina, and time. In an era when instant gratification seems endemic, good old-fashioned discipline lays a solid foundation for success in adult life. Discipline evolves into a pattern